Astronaut Training Gift – The dream starts here.

With all of space and time on the menu who wouldn’t want to be an astronaut?! And if you think being an Apollo astronaut is a bit crap compared to being Dr Who, please keep it in perspective. ASTRONAUT!!

But not everyone is made of the right stuff for astronauting. There’s got to be a way to weed out the crap. That’s what Apollo Astronaut Training is for.  Medical tests, physical training, procedural training, extra-vehicular training, experiment training, geology training and origami practice.

Have you ever wanted to go into space? You know, watching galaxies being born and stars going supernova; experiencing hyperdrive travel with a psychopathic ship’s computer, that sort of thing?

Well, unless you’re Dr Who, our super crap Apollo Astronaut Training gift is probably the closest you’re going to get!

So grab your space suit, go get ready for the centrifuge challenge, and kiss your lunch goodbye!

INSTRUCTIONS

• You will need – a broom, comfortable shoes, a bucket full of different sized soft(ish) objects, a friend
• Find an outside space where you have room to move about
• Make sure your friend is ready to film your efforts, you’ll need to assess your performance later

Centrifuge Challenge

• Hold the broom in both hands over your head
• Keeping your gaze up at the top of the broom, spin yourself around 20 times (ask your friend to count out loud for you)
• Put the broom down on the ground and jump over it

External Events Challenge

• Give the bucket of soft(ish) objects to your friend
• Start running around about your outside space
• Your friend will now throw the objects at you from anywhere they like
• Try to avoid being hit
• Congratulations – you have started your Apollo Astronaut Training!

Bespoke your Astronaut Training Gift

After completing the physical training we’ve provided, why not move through the other aspects, make an origami swan whilst wearing a pair of gardening gloves, ask a 15-year-old to test you on some maths questions.

SUITABLE FOR:
Anyone called Neil Armstrong
Teenagers
People that think they’re super geniuses
Brian

If you think this gift is amazing, then maybe you would like our Plane Spotting Gift too – another fun gift from Crap Presents